Osho, “I have many friends but the question: ‘Who is a real friend?’ always arises in my mind. Will you say something about it?”
Osho Answers – “You are asking from the wrong end. Never ask, ‘Who is my real friend?’ Ask, ‘Am I a real friend to somebody?’
That is the right question. Why are you worried about whether others are friends to you or not?
The proverb is: A friend in need is a friend indeed. But deep down that is greed. That is not friendship; that is not love. You want to use the other as a means, and no man is a means, every man is an end unto himself. Why are you so worried about who is a real friend?
The real question has to be, ‘Am I friendly to people?’ Do you know what friendship is? It is the highest form of love. In love, there is bound to be some lust; in friendship, all lust disappears. In friendship, nothing gross remains; it becomes absolutely subtle.
Friendliness is simply the joy of sharing without any conditions, without any expectations, with no desire that something should be returned – not even gratefulness.
Friendliness is the purest kind of love.
Friendship becomes a relationship, fixed; friendliness is more flowing, more fluid. Friendship is a relationship, friendliness is a state of your being.
You are simply friendly; to whom, that is not the point. If you are standing by the side of a tree you are friendly to the tree, or if you are sitting on the rock, you are friendly to the rock. To human beings, to animals, to birds, you are simply friendly. It is not something static; it is a flow, changing moment to moment.
Friendliness is one of the most significant qualities for the seeker to develop; it is really sweet. It makes your whole life full of sweet music, full of sweet harmony. In Buddha’s vision it is higher than so-called love.”
Osho Talk – Two Flowers Bloom
