Controlling vs. Allowing

June 15, 2017

d6161b9f1ffe5ee9e0b5187a080a0379“These two words, control and allowing are synonyms for attachment and non-attachment.   If you allow, you let others go in love; if you control, you attach them instead to your own way of doing things, your own beliefs and expectations.

When one person is trying to control another in a relationship, he usually doesn’t admit what is going on.  Instead, his motivations are made to look like love.  Isn’t it loving to protect your partner, look out for her interests, oversee her wants and desires?  For many people this passes as genuine love.  But controlling people deeply fear abandonment.  They are afraid someone will reject them and they will be powerless.”  “The Path to Love,” P.198, Deepak Chopra

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